BOSSIER CITY, La. (KTAL/KMSS) – The wife of a Barksdale Airman who was fatally shot in his driveway two years ago spoke out Thursday for the first time since the slaying.

“People tell you that time heals all but I don’t really believe that,” said Alyssa Kidd, days after sitting in the courtroom as 19-year-old Jareona Crosby was sentenced to life in prison for the murder of her husband, 30-year-old TSgt. Joshua Kidd.

The shooting happened in September 2018. Prosecutors say Joshua confronted Crosby and accomplice Alonzo Wilson while they were breaking into the garage of their Bossier City home. Alyssa says their son, who was two at the time, wasn’t feeling well that night.

“So when I went to go get him and Joshua decided to get up for work, earlier than normal. He always got to work early. He went to the garage and that’s when I heard him yell. I knew something was wrong.”

Moments later, she heard gunshots.

“I see Joshua,” Alyssa recalled, pausing to collect her emotions. “And I see him grabbing his chest. I see him. I see him look at me and I see him fall. The first thing that went through my mind was, ‘Oh my God, Beckham,’ and I know that is the first thing that went through his mind, because that boy was everything to him.”

Now that that Crosby and his accomplice are in prison, Alyssa says she feels safe to talk about the devastating loss and wants to keep Joshua’s memory alive.

“I feel like I can finally talk or finally take a breath and just share with everyone who Joshua was,” she said. “I’ve never met somebody so motivated. He was just so enthusiastic about everything. He talked with his arms, he was this big gentle giant. I mean he filled a room instantly. I will miss that type of energy that he brought.”

After his death, Alyssa says she heard from hundreds of people on Facebook about how Joshua touched their lives, some who credit him with saving them. She said the pain of losing a loved one is almost as hard as the life her son now has to live.

“There are days where you can smile and appreciate the time you did have, but when it comes to my son, it is just hard to watch him grow up without a father,” Alyssa said. “He would say his dad is in heaven and every night before bed we will say, ‘Let’s tell Daddy, we love you.’ We would sit there and talk to Joshua and he loves that.”

Wilson, who was 15 at the time, is serving 50 years without the possibility of parole after pleading guilty to second-degree murder in October 2019. Crosby was 17 at the time, barely an adult herself. On Tuesday, Alyssa faced her in the courtroom.

“You know I’ve hated these kids for so long. So much hatred that I didn’t think it was possible for me to even connect with them as a human. But when I saw them in person, especially at sentencing the other day, it’s like I finally saw her as a human and all the hatred went away.”

She wants Crosby and Wilson to learn from this experience and possibly use it to help others.

“All I can hope for is that, with what they have done, that somehow they can become an advocate in jail or talk to kids so they don’t have to grow up in this type of atmosphere. Just try to be the change that this city needs.”

Alyssa, who was also a technical sergeant at Barksdale at the time, is now out of the Air Force. She says and her son, who is now four, are planning to relocate out of state with family for a new start in life.